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Relationship and Marriage counseling can assist you find out how suitable you are.

The two most important factors that decide how compatible you are as a couple are:

A similar degree of psychological vitality and maturity and a similar ranking of Instinctual Variants.

What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the natural energies or drive that are inherently part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.

Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual variant are often with the basic survival needs as they translate into our modern society, for example, money, food, housing, health, physical safety and comfort.
Being secure and physically comfortable are essential, and they will tend to bring these supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable seating, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will like the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of important necessities of life.
They are the most introverted of the types.

Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this variant have a strong desire for intensity of experience and affection. The blunt riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a situation they automatically gravitate toward people they feel magnetized to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can be intimacy addicts, often neglecting pressing matters or even basic hygiene if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a wide ranging exploratory philosophy to life, but can also give a lack of focus on one’s own achievements.

Social Instinct.
People of this type are focused on their interactions with other people and with the sense of value and esteem they derive from their involvement in collective activities. These include work, relationships, side activities and clubs.
Upon entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the relationships and subtle politics between different people and groups. They are subconsciously focused on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to touch base with others to feel secure, acknowledged and energised. They tend to love interacting with others, but they eschew intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.

Within a personality, one of these three Instincts will dominate. In fact the three instincts can be ordered liked the sections of a cake, with the most predominant one at the top. The weakest one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These instincts play an important role in our relationships because personalities of the same type tend to share values and to understand each other innately, and therefore feel very compatible.

In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.

For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.

For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.